She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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