p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
