this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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