Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Randomize
