frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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