is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize
