Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
