I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
