M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize