one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
We need to rekindle our bromance
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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