I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
