And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
