its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
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I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
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You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize