I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
