Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
