I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
