I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
My breasts were aching with rage.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
