drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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