my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
