Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Randomize
