butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
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