The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
