it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize