would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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