Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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