I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
4 words: hood of his car
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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