what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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