My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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