I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize