My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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