the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
