I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Randomize
