Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
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