Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
