Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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