Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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