they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
