i don't like sucking hair
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
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