she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
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