he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
