I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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