Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
