a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
