OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
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