man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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