Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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