i jhust puked up my retainher.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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