Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
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