OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize