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• (650): View more from California

  Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.

  Fav 2 1192 677

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex

  Fav 31 5535 945

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.

  Fav 20 3011 1377

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia

  Fav 3 1622 3598

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.

  Fav 41 3998 1855

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.

  Fav 5 3148 1028

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• (512): View more from Texas

  I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?

  Fav 6 824 1796

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.

  (1-651): View more from Minnesota

  It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.

  Fav 8 2696 718

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.

  Fav 2 507 760

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• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (408): View more from California

  I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi

  (408): View more from California

  so I peed on it

  Fav 5 1276 554

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.

  Fav 0 617 468

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.

  Fav 1 540 366

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• (425): View more from Washington

  I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.

  Fav 1 137 75

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Dick very happy bro

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• (805): View more from California

  Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.

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