Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick

  (714): View more from California

  Ive only called 5 times

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  (714): He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick (714): Ive only called 5 times http://tfl.nu/v81b
  Replies (16) Good night (686) Bad night (1604)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.

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  (304): I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did. http://tfl.nu/mi39
  Replies (6) Good night (3579) Bad night (772)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible

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  (859): I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible http://tfl.nu/51ze
  Replies (22) Good night (733) Bad night (3043)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf

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  (540): I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf http://tfl.nu/8zma
  Replies (31) Good night (2776) Bad night (603)
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?

  (760): View more from California

  and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook

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  (909): do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"? (760): and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook http://tfl.nu/nbai
  Replies (28) Good night (4956) Bad night (845)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!

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  (732): i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!! http://tfl.nu/t5uq
  Replies (80) Good night (7721) Bad night (2850)
• Favorite

  (361): View more from Texas

  Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?

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  (361): Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one? http://tfl.nu/k16y
  Replies (15) Good night (9017) Bad night (1279)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.

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  (360): And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that. http://tfl.nu/r3iu
  Replies (6) Good night (2839) Bad night (984)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.

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  (323): When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection. http://tfl.nu/ukok
  Replies (12) Good night (1689) Bad night (3322)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.

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  (519): My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again. http://tfl.nu/uf58
  Replies (15) Good night (887) Bad night (3908)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.

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  (410): My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end. http://tfl.nu/noz9
  Replies (12) Good night (737) Bad night (3078)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.

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  (541): I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea. http://tfl.nu/3k5t
  Replies (11) Good night (1225) Bad night (838)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first

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  (613): I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first http://tfl.nu/99uo
  Replies (1) Good night (633) Bad night (430)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...

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  (832): If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day... http://tfl.nu/wshn
  Replies (1) Good night (268) Bad night (371)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.

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  (727): You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again. http://tfl.nu/3xcj
  Replies (0) Good night (515) Bad night (417)

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