like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
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