idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize